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Season 14
Season opener. Don, Jack and Dennis do the commercial as Peter, Paul and Mary. At Billy Graham's request, the skit is redone according to a new formula in which there are no insults to
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Season opener. Don, Jack and Dennis do the commercial as Peter, Paul and Mary. At Billy Graham's request, the skit is redone according to a new formula in which there are no insults to anyone, and everyone is quiet and sweet; Dennis reports that he went to UCLA over the summer. Billy Graham gives a short inspirational message.
Jack makes his entrance from the opposite side of the stage, and stands with his back to the audience out of force of habit. Don rolls out a carpet, and Goulet comes out vacuuming it—he
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Jack makes his entrance from the opposite side of the stage, and stands with his back to the audience out of force of habit. Don rolls out a carpet, and Goulet comes out vacuuming it—he had failed to read the fine print on his contract. Goulet tells about growing up in Canada, tells a Nelson Eddy joke, discusses playing nightclubs with Jack, and sings, This is all I ask. Jack questions Goulet’s reputation as a ladies’ man, leading into the sketch: in flashback, Jack sees Goulet and his girl at a Hollywood nightclub; his girl makes a pass at Jack. Later we learn that in fact Jack’s girl made a pass at Goulet.
Don, Carol and Jack make their entrance jumping through large doorways covered with paper; Jack can't break through and Carol has to do it for him. Jack and Carol talk about her desire
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Don, Carol and Jack make their entrance jumping through large doorways covered with paper; Jack can't break through and Carol has to do it for him. Jack and Carol talk about her desire to become a director, and she makes some suggestions about his show. She sings "Sweet Georgia Brown." In the sketch, Jack, Don, and Carol play riverboat card sharks out to cheat each other.
In the monologue, Jack discusses the writing of his autobiography. He introduces Clint Walker, saying they both have a lot in common: both were born in Illinois, joined the Navy and have
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In the monologue, Jack discusses the writing of his autobiography. He introduces Clint Walker, saying they both have a lot in common: both were born in Illinois, joined the Navy and have blue eyes. Clint Walker sings The Navajo Trail. Clint mentions that they are casting for his twin brother in his new picture. Don comes out with a table on wheels, and demonstrates that he can eat a whole meal, and still have room for JELL-O. In the sketch, Jack, in elevator shoes, auditions for Clint Walker's twin brother; he watches a prior applicant rehearse a scene in which the twin brother is beaten up, and decides he doesn't want the part after all. Remake of the sketch done Sept. 21, 1958 with Gary Cooper.
Jack gives Johnny Carson advice on how to run the Tonight show. Johnny does card tricks, plays the drums, sings and dances to Ballin' the Jack. They do a mock version of the Tonight show
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Jack gives Johnny Carson advice on how to run the Tonight show. Johnny does card tricks, plays the drums, sings and dances to Ballin' the Jack. They do a mock version of the Tonight show with Jack as Johnny's guest. Don Wilson does a man-on-the-street interview for the commercial.
Jack hears on the morning talk show 'This is Hollywood' that James and Gloria Stewart are making a movie together. He decided to go to the studio to wish them good luck. On the set, he
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Jack hears on the morning talk show 'This is Hollywood' that James and Gloria Stewart are making a movie together. He decided to go to the studio to wish them good luck. On the set, he ruins take after take, then tries to take over direction of the film; sketch is similar to the one done on March 9, 1958.
Ed Sullivan is nervous about doing "His first Dramatic part" on the show, but he gets into the spirit playing an attorney defending a French girl accused of murder. The case seems to be
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Ed Sullivan is nervous about doing "His first Dramatic part" on the show, but he gets into the spirit playing an attorney defending a French girl accused of murder. The case seems to be stacked against district attorney Jack when the entire jury are beret-and-smock wearing,baguette-wielding Frenchmen.
At the library, Jack has a note from his doctor excusing him from his fourteen cent overdue fine. Dennis is checking out Veblen and Gibbon—he has to walk by UCLA on his way home, and
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At the library, Jack has a note from his doctor excusing him from his fourteen cent overdue fine. Dennis is checking out Veblen and Gibbon—he has to walk by UCLA on his way home, and doesn't want to look stupid. Jack recommends that Dennis read Robinson Crusoe. Don comes in with news of State Farm Insurance; Jack tries to tell him to be quiet, but the librarian says, "Let him talk, stupid." In the sketch, Jack plays Robinson Crusoe and Dennis plays Friday. Includes references to Rain and The Lawrence Welk Show.
The sketch is the same as the one done on Sept. 13, 1953. Jack is waiting for his ship to depart for Los Angeles after his Hawaiian vacation. Everyone is given a lei except him.
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The sketch is the same as the one done on Sept. 13, 1953. Jack is waiting for his ship to depart for Los Angeles after his Hawaiian vacation. Everyone is given a lei except him. Slepperman appears and gives him one made of chicken livers. Rochester arrives late because he has been crowned King Kameamea VI by the islanders. On board, Dennis appears; he tells Jack he swam all the way to Hawaii, then jumps overboard to swim home. Jack falls asleep and dreams he has a shipboard romance with Jayne Mansfield. Jayne sings "You're just too marvellous for words," and Jack wakes to discover he has just kissed an overweight woman passenger.
Jack is working on a Julius Caesar sketch, while being pursued by an amorous female fan. Don does the State Farm commercial as an encounter with an admirer who thinks State Farm is
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Jack is working on a Julius Caesar sketch, while being pursued by an amorous female fan. Don does the State Farm commercial as an encounter with an admirer who thinks State Farm is terrific because it paid for his car accident even though he wasn't insured with them. Dennis wants to take over the show for a few weeks, so he hires a Benny impersonator to make phone calls in Benny's name, and thus make Jack think he is going crazy; Jack winds up on the mental ward of the hospital.
Jack's monologue is about golfing. He calls up a man from the audience who turns out to be a TV statistician, and tells Jack he has told 80,000 jokes and gotten 30,000 laughs. Dennis
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Jack's monologue is about golfing. He calls up a man from the audience who turns out to be a TV statistician, and tells Jack he has told 80,000 jokes and gotten 30,000 laughs. Dennis comes out to say he quits because Jack has called him stupid 2,000 times. In the sketch, Don, Jack and Dennis play the Three Musketeers: Jackels, Donnels and Dennells.
Jack hosts an amateur talent contest with a barefoot tap dancer, an acrobat and his dog, a drunk acrobat, and a Mexican musical group led by Mel Blanc. Benny and Jessel do a skit.
Jack hosts an amateur talent contest with a barefoot tap dancer, an acrobat and his dog, a drunk acrobat, and a Mexican musical group led by Mel Blanc. Benny and Jessel do a skit.
Jack asks two members of the audience to read the commercial, while he does sound effects. Benny plays the violin. The audience sings 'Auld lang syne.' Mary calls Jack to congratulate
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Jack asks two members of the audience to read the commercial, while he does sound effects. Benny plays the violin. The audience sings 'Auld lang syne.' Mary calls Jack to congratulate him on doing the whole show by himself without any supporting cast, and to ask him to take out the garbage when he gets home.
Jack and his long-time best friend George Burns play golf, but Jack quickly storms back to his office, crying foul to his secretary. George strolls in next, smoking a victory cigar,
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Jack and his long-time best friend George Burns play golf, but Jack quickly storms back to his office, crying foul to his secretary. George strolls in next, smoking a victory cigar, causing Jack to flee again. So, George makes himself at home at Jack's desk, and relates to Jack's secretary Ms. Gordon, how he met Jack 40 years before, in a cheap Chicago rooming house.
Peter, Paul and Mary sing Blowin' in the Wind, and a folk song about Jack. In the sketch, Jack has invited them to his house, where he asks them to record a song he wrote.
Peter, Paul and Mary sing Blowin' in the Wind, and a folk song about Jack. In the sketch, Jack has invited them to his house, where he asks them to record a song he wrote.
Nat King Cole sings "Day in, day out," and "When I fall in love." In the sketch Jack plays his violin with his band members, while 5-year-old Jimmy Bradley plays the drums.
Nat King Cole sings "Day in, day out," and "When I fall in love." In the sketch Jack plays his violin with his band members, while 5-year-old Jimmy Bradley plays the drums.
Jack thinks Bobby Darin would be just the person to play him in a film based on his life.
Jack thinks Bobby Darin would be just the person to play him in a film based on his life.
Benny monologue. Miss Beverly Hills sings "Only one man," and does strip. In skit, Don pretends to break his leg so that his son Harlow can have his big chance. Harlow reads "Ode to California."
Benny monologue. Miss Beverly Hills sings "Only one man," and does strip. In skit, Don pretends to break his leg so that his son Harlow can have his big chance. Harlow reads "Ode to California."
Jack explains that it is because of long shots that he manages to look so good on television year after year; in close-up he is covered with wrinkles. Dennis comes out with a palm tree
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Jack explains that it is because of long shots that he manages to look so good on television year after year; in close-up he is covered with wrinkles. Dennis comes out with a palm tree because Jack never gives him any scenery, and sings 'Cocktails for two.' Don does the State Farm Car Insurance commercial with the yodelling owner of a Swiss chalet. In the sketch, Jack remembers how he found Dennis and hired him to sing on his radio show. After hearing a recording of Dennis' voice, incomplete because Dennis had run out of quarters for the machine, Jack sets out to find him, going from one job to another at which Dennis has been fired. He finally locates him working in the kitchen of a Chinese restaurant.
Coming home from his show, Jack receives a message to call a Dr. Johnson. The doctor asks him to come right over. Dr. Johnson is a psychiatrist who has found a man with amnesia who keeps
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Coming home from his show, Jack receives a message to call a Dr. Johnson. The doctor asks him to come right over. Dr. Johnson is a psychiatrist who has found a man with amnesia who keeps repeating Jack's name. Jack identifies the amnesia victim as Professor Le Blanc, his old violin teacher; in flashback, we see he has gone crazy because Jack plays so badly. To cure Le Blanc, Jack plays his violin beautifully, and Le Blanc, realizing he is not a failure as a violin teacher, recovers. Jack asks the doctor not to reveal that he is such a good violinist because he has made so much money as a bad one.
Don introduces Jack wrapped as a gift to the television audience, unwrapped by two beautiful dancers, but the box is empty; Jack is afraid of the dark. Jack spends the program answering
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Don introduces Jack wrapped as a gift to the television audience, unwrapped by two beautiful dancers, but the box is empty; Jack is afraid of the dark. Jack spends the program answering requests from viewers. One viewer asks that Dennis sing 'Love in bloom,' but Dennis doesn't know it. Another asks that Jack give Harlow a break, so Jack lets Harlow do his imitation of Sophie Tucker for the State Farm commercial. Another asks that Jack put her husband's wild animal act on; he is eaten by his lion. Instead of having Jackie Gleason back, as requested, Jack does an impersonation of him; Dennis does Crazy Guggenheim. Then Benny announces he is going to do his impersonation of Danny Kaye, and Danny Kaye appears. The last request is that Jack play one classical number on his violin straight through without jokes, but the lion drives him off the stage.
This episode has no summary.
This episode has no summary.
Jack daydreams that he is fight manager for Kid Dynamite (Dennis Day).
Jack daydreams that he is fight manager for Kid Dynamite (Dennis Day).
Jack rehearses some Dixieland music on his violin with members of his band. Then he does some public service announcements, including one on safe driving; a close-up of his driver's
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Jack rehearses some Dixieland music on his violin with members of his band. Then he does some public service announcements, including one on safe driving; a close-up of his driver's license reveals it has expired. He and Don go to the California Dept. of Motor Vehicles to renew his license. While there, Don buys (from a con man/ventriloquist) a parrot that sings about State Farm Insurance.
Jack's guests, the pop singing group The Lettermen, provoke surprisingly strong reactions from Jack Benny and his regular singer Dennis Day. They bump Dennis from singing on the show at
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Jack's guests, the pop singing group The Lettermen, provoke surprisingly strong reactions from Jack Benny and his regular singer Dennis Day. They bump Dennis from singing on the show at all, so he skulks behind the scenery as the Phantom of the Comedy. Jack, The Waukegan Wizard, claims he earned a high school letter as a cheerleader, but regrets he didn't attend college, so the World's Oldest Freshman enrolls with The Lettermen.
After the show, Jack calls a meeting in his dressing room to ask the cast and crew not to make so many mistakes. They point out that he, too, made mistakes on the show; for example, he
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After the show, Jack calls a meeting in his dressing room to ask the cast and crew not to make so many mistakes. They point out that he, too, made mistakes on the show; for example, he kept scratching his arm. Don does the State Farm commercial over again to ask Jack where he could have possibly made a mistake; Jack points out that this week they were on for General Foods. Jack decides he has been scratching his arm because of a skin allergy, and visits several allergists. He eventually discovers that he is allergic to Dennis.
Don has arranged for Harlow to take the sponsor's daughter on a date. Unfortunately, Harlow has never been on a date before.
Don has arranged for Harlow to take the sponsor's daughter on a date. Unfortunately, Harlow has never been on a date before.
Jack discusses the ability of radio to paint pictures in the mind, and Mel Blanc demonstrates his various voices. Jack and Dennis redo the sketch from Jan. 27 1957, in which Jack plays the Fiddler.
Jack discusses the ability of radio to paint pictures in the mind, and Mel Blanc demonstrates his various voices. Jack and Dennis redo the sketch from Jan. 27 1957, in which Jack plays the Fiddler.
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