The newest recruit to team Shut Up & Sit Down takes a look at King of Tokyo. A game of throwing handfuls of heavy dice at your friends, as hard as you can. I might have got that wrong. Is that wrong, Matt?

We can’t get enough of The Resistance. We’d mainline it if we could. It’s a perfect game that cuts a table full of people into ignorant heroes and traitorous spies. All the good guys need to do is send three teams on three succesful missions, which is tricky… because the spies know who one another are. It’s a game better seen than explained. Only then will you suffocating weight of the lies this game spawns. Here, we’re playing The Resistance: Avalon, a standalone sequel with an Arthurian theme.

FIRE! What is it? We don’t really know. Except that it’s excellent. Fire? It’s pretty great. In this inaugral episode of The Opener, Matt looks at opening your game night with a fiery game of Flash Point: Fire Rescue and a cocktail that’s literally on fire. Because you can never have too much fire, and that’s a fact. EDIT: OK so we just got a call from Paul screaming that he tried to make the cocktail and now has “Too much fire,” so we may have to temporarily redact that.

Splash! Splutter. Cough. You’ve just washed up on the shores of the best game we’ve looked at in ages. Friends, newcomers, children of all ages, please enjoy this review of the ethically dubious Archipelago. It’s early days, this might end up being our game of 2013. Who knows? If Archipelago teaches us anything, it’s to plan for the future. The future, and also for what you’re going to do with all those sodding pineapples. Enjoy, guys.

Introducing the rare SU&SD DOUBLE FEATURE! Commence rejoicing, and insert babies and hats into your triumphant tossing machines. First up, we’ve got Quinns reviewing Japanese-designed String Railway. Oooh, it’s an irritatingly clever one that we’re big fans of. THEN you’ll all be able to enjoy the inaugral Board Gaming with Brendan. Which is… it… it’s something you can watch. Enjoy, people!

August, 1942. The Germans begin their deadly assault of the Russian city of Stalingrad. April, 2013. Team SU&SD assemble to recreate that fateful battle. But with more food. And arguably, more swearing. The 2-8 player Overlord scenarios for featherweight wargame Memoir ’44 are unbelievable fun. To recreate them, you’ll need EITHER two copies of Memoir ’44, or, as seen here, ONE copy of Memoir ’44, ONE copy of the Operation Overlord expansion, and ONE of the official Battle Maps. Got that? Great. WARNING: No amount of preparation will actually prepare you.

Quickly! Watch this video! We don’t know how long it’ll be until (REDACTED) bring down the feed. This is our review of City of Remnants, a wonderful new release that lets you and your friends duke it out over a fallen city. It’s a veritable ball pen full of drugs, robots, guns and grenades. We’re not going to lie. The most remarkable thing in the video is Quinns claiming he grew up “on the streets”. AGAIN. What’s wrong with him?

Get ready to GET EXTRAVAGANT! The Opener is a search for the perfect way to start your board game night. Already, in the second ever episode, Matt might have found it. Ladies & Gentlemen is a team game about Victorian women shopping furiously for a glamorous ball, as well as the husbands they command like so many nervous ponies. How angry could you get about an imaginary dress? You’re wrong. You’re so wrong. Matt also suggests you make scones, which are apparently the adorable training wheels of the baking world. We wouldn’t know. Our oven’s been broken since Paul baked Talisman that one time.

We’re HUGE Star Wars fans here at SU&SD. Phasers! Klingons. The holodeck. We just can’t get enough! So what will Quinns make of Star Wars: The Card Game? How will it compare to the new X-Wing Miniatures Game (our old review of which is here)? Who’s this Dark Side Quinns? And hang on what HELL is going on with THAT ENDING QUINNS. WE NEED TO HAVE WORDS.

This time around, we look at the sexy, sweaty, sword-wielding game of gladiatorial combat that is Spartacus: A Game of Blood & Treachery! Last year, Spartacus’ gory magnetism earned it a huge following. Designers Gale Force Nine thought they’d slipped SU&SD by, but this was NOT THE CASE. We’re here now, and we’re finally answering all the important questions. Is it as good as the TV series? Have any of us actually seen the TV series? And who is Spartacus?

Oh my goodness! The Anniversary Edition of Galaxy Trucker is here! It’s huge! And it weighs in at 8.82lbs, which is MORE THAN MOST BABIES. Galaxy Trucker has been one of SU&SD’s favourite babies since we reviewed it in our sixth ever episode, the Vlaada Chvátil Special. It’s a game of building spaceships out of sewage pipes, launching them on “profitable” adventures, then crying as they fall apart like lego in a tumble drier. It’s just so inventive, and so, so funny. If you haven’t got it yet, the Anniversary Edition is an absurd quantity of game. You get Galaxy Trucker itself, BOTH expansions (“The Big Expansion” and “Another Big Expansion”), AND some extra bits. Just watch. Watch, and see how much you need this box in your life.

Last year we reviewed a very special game called A Few Acres of Snow. Now, it’s hard to say what’s weirder. That we’ve reviewed YET ANOTHER simulation of a Canadian war, or that a game called 1812: The Invasion of Canada is secretly great fun. But that’s not all! This video comes packed with a tiny little Let’s Play of Jazz: The Singing Card Game, as well as the second ever instalment of Board Games With Brendan and a tiny cameo from Guts of Glory. Hot beans. How’s everyone finding the videos-every-Friday thing? We’re having fun with it. It just feels correct, somehow. Oh, and for everyone who misses our full episodes, you’ll have something to be very happy about at the end of the month. …What could it be, do you think?

A review special! Not just one game review, but a hatful! Now this is something a bit different. Fueled entirely by sugar and caffeine, we typed and shot this review in just half a day. Our mission? To review half a dozen games with two minutes allotted to each. Approximately. Thereabouts. Oh God. But we met with a success of sorts and here, for your viewing pleasure, is the result. We look at games old and new, including D-Day Dice, Ingenious, Samurai Sword, Goblins, Inc., Shadow Hunters and Betrayal at the House on the Hill, but NOT IN THAT ORDER. Several days after filming, the sugar may not have entirely worn off. Still, this was a good experience for us and training of sorts. Preparation for… something greater.

Oh my goodness! Terra Mystica is a fantasy building that boasts two achievements: It’s the heaviest box we’ve ever reviewed, and the one to sell out fastest. Scientists are at a loss to explain this heinous corruption of the laws of physics. Tell you who’s not at a loss, though! The hot boys of Shut Up & Sit Down. After just few plays of this beast, we’re ready to tell you whether we think it lives up to the hype. (It does.) (CREDIT CARDS AT THE READY, PEOPLE.)

Get ready to GET EXTRAVAGANT! Matt Lees’ The Opener is back with another game to kick off your evening, and a perfect accompanying snack. This week Matt picks over the crashed zepplin of ideas that is Level 99 Games’ Minigame Library, and finds something interesting but it goes a bit wrong. He also applies his trademark culinary expertise to an English delicacy known as “vodka jelly”, which seems quite interesting but it goes a bit wrong. We blame the heat. Englishmen react about as well to heat as chocolate does. When will it end? It must be 20°C in here.

Quarantine, an adorable little game of running a hospital, has launched! Seems like only yesterday that Quinns was squeaking about its design diaries over in the games news, and now it’s on shelves worldwide. They grow up so fast! This one’s a game that Quinns really wants to like. But he’s also the owner of a degree in Tough Love from Newcastle University. Will it meet his ever-soaring standards? Or will he toss it aside like so much medical waste?

Also in celebration of our 2nd anniversary, we’ve done something a bit different. And hopefully, a bit useful. It’s a short video about board gaming that’s not for you, but any friends, family or colleagues who don’t yet know about your hobby. A glimmering, electric antidote, if you will, for anyone who hears “Board games” and thinks “Monopoly”. There aren’t any swears at all, and only a smidge of dressing up, so please: Share away. Let’s tell the world about this glorious hobby of ours. Happy anniversary, everybody. We love you.

Disclaimer: Since this video was published, SU&SD has been made aware of a striking quantity of homophobic and transphobic content in this board game. The game’s tone was first established by the first edition in 1985, and today, it’s definitely showing its age. When was the last time you had some friends over, one of you got abducted by an elephant, one captained a war fleet and another had eight babies*? It was NEVER, wasn’t it? Admit it! Tales of the Arabian Nights can fix that. You might not know it, but there’s a gaping hole in your board game collection. A hole that begs to be filled. And you must fill it. You must fill it with this. The finest storytelling board game in existence. Have a great weekend, everybody! Ideally, make sure it’s great by playing this. *And was then abducted by an elephant.

Reviewers? ASSEMBLE! It’s time to do battle with the increasingly popular Sentinels of the Multiverse! A co-operative, customisable, and increasingly collectible game of excitingly litigious superheroes fighting stinky villains. This game’s getting more and more popular, so it’s only natural we should see if you guys should get in on the action. (Besides, it’s the best excuse we’ve had to dress up in AGES.)

Like the tomb robbers of old, Quinns has cracked the seal on our copy of Kemet, heedless of all those snakes, scorpions and ancient Egyptian curses to bring you our definitive review. But there’s a problem! This game is the spiritual sequel to Cyclades, yet another svelete, gorgeous game of warring gods from the same publisher. Who will come out on top, in this divine duel? Should you buy this is you already have the other? And why is the SU&SD supercomputer so rubbish?

Matt’s only gone and looked at a new way to open your game night! Isn’t he an great? Holding his ground on the very frontlines of play like a big ol’ play… man. This month he’s encouraging us to don the masks of the fabulous Mascarade by Bruno Faidutti, one of our favourite designers. This game is pretty. It’s funny. It’s simple. Most of it even occurs underneath the table. But most excitingly of all, Matt’s baking again! Today is a good day.

Have you heard of Escape: The Curse of the Temple? Rumoured to be greatest family game of all time, they say it can be found in the Temple to the God of Luck, in the world’s most unfun jungle. Wait. No, hang on, that’s wrong. It’s in Quinns’ flat. In this review, we answer the question of whether you should buy Escape, we take a look at the Illusions expansion, AND we compare the whole thing to Space Alert. Now, only one question remains: How did Quinns get so dirty?

Once we heard about all the love and awards Village was earning we just had to dispatch Paul and Quinns, SU&SD’s softest city boys, to take a look. This one’s a true simulation the simple life, perfect for anybody who wants to breed horses, dedicate themselves to the church or murder their relatives when nobody’s looking. Village has an expansion, Village Inn, but Quinns has been a very good boy and not bought it. …Right, Quinns? Oh, and if you don’t recognise that intro, go and acquire all 17 episodes of The Prisoner immediately. You can thank us later.

This week Quinns looks at The Cave! A game about caves and the people who love them and sometimes get stuck in them. Which might sound rubbish, but did you ever consider that caves are basically nature’s dungeons? We’re also very proud to present the segment that you lot have been begging for: Quinns’ Netrunner Tips!

We like to think of SU&SD as one big family. Sadly, according to GOV.UK that’s wrong, and a family needs at least 2 children, 1 drinking problem and (at least) 1 farting dog. But that wasn’t going to stop us from reviewing the year’s hottest new family board game! Augustus is a simulation of dispatching Roman legions to different corners of the earth that recently got nominated for a very prestigious German award. Also, Quinns is back with another hot Netrunner tip. Have you heard of Netrunner? It’s really good. You should play it.

We love stories here at SU&SD, and if there’s one thing we like better than telling stories to our parents or the police, it’s storytelling games! Enter Winter Tales, stage right. A game where players control familiar fairytale characters viewed through a dark, oil-streaked lens. In this video we also find the time for a quick peek at gaming institution Once Upon a Time, which just recently received a gorgeous 3rd edition! Which will win? The classic, or the newcomer? Or NEITHER? Or both! Such terrible tension! We’d click play and find out as soon as possible, if we were you.

It’s come to this. After a phenomenally successful first year, in which the British press described us as “the sound of the summer” and “London’s two most eligible bachelors”, team SU&SD are now cold, alone, and reviewing a board game about trains. It’s called Trains. This is us at our lowest, surely. On frosty Autumn nights like these, we’re glad for the company of the SU&SD supercomputer. She’s our one true friend. …Right?

With Halloween just around the corner (or, as we call it here in England, “All Hallow’s Ween”), we’re very proud to present part 1 of our spooktacular gaming suggestions! Neatly reviewed in time for you to place and receive your order in time for the sexiest night of the year. Or was that Pancake Tuesday? Anyway, to begin with, what could be simpler, safer or spookier than an evening of Ultimate Werewolf? Just you, a big pot of chilli, and between 4 and 60 of your closest friends.

Halloween is close, now. Can you feel it? The sticky breath on the back of your neck? The bony hand on your thigh when all the lights are out? Getting higher… and higher… Following on from Matt’s suggestion of Werewolf last week, Paul and Quinns are offering a couple more creepy gaming suggestions. Including one board game of a real life monster. Happy Halloween, everybody. Stay safe.

Apologies for all the murder that’s been going on this week. It’s very inconvenient. Can Seasons, a game of great wizardy, set things right, or is there only worse to come? We’re also proud to present the return of Boardgaming with Brendan, and our long-awaited concept review of Dominant Species! Maybe not having Quinns around isn’t so bad after all.

Look what we found! The unaired SU&SD pilot from 1974! And reviewing such contemporary board games! Crazy. Watch as the boys take their first halting steps through the gorgeous Legends of Andor, and stick it to the man with a look at two titles from Victory Point Games’ catalogue: Darkest Night and Moonbase Alpha. You might remember VPG as the small publisher Quinns talked about earlier in the year, whose games come with a complimentary napkin. Keep on rocking, guys.

When you think SU&SD, we know you think “co-ordinated,” “graceful,” probably even “lithe.” So this was a long time coming- a video featuring three of our favourite dexterity games on the market today. The noble Oss, the exotic Toc Toc Woodman and the farcical Cube Quest, all showcased lovingly by us in time for Christmas! One more word, from Brendan: “I’ve put an end to all this sodding continuity, too.” What on earth is he talking about?

Once again, purely for your amusement, we suffer yet more pain and indignity in deep space. This time, Pip, Matt, Brendan, Quinns and Paul are all playing Space Cadets, a co-operative game of spaceship piloting where everything can and will go wrong. Repeatedly. Forever. It’s okay! Quinns has played it before and knows what he’s doing, though he’s not actually in charge. Space Cadets is one big game made up of many, many minigames, which means that, if it goes to hell, it’s one big disaster made up of many smaller ones. But that’s not going to happen, is it? Is it?

It’s Friday once again! This week, Paul takes us on a historical tangent and, in a video a little more serious than some of our others, investigates Freedom: The Underground Railroad. It’s a game about freeing slaves, about subverting and ultimately abolishing the slave trade, and it’s a co-operative challenge that you can also try solo. It’s also monstrously difficult. Too difficult?

Would you like to come on an ADVENTURE? Get some treasure, some glory, back home in time for tea? So you’ll come? …What’s that? Oh, nowhere special. Just the Cutthroat Caverns. No! Come back! It’s only a name! What about you, dear reader? Will you join us? If you’re brave enough, you’ll see there’s an awful lot of fun to be had in those dingy, treacherous caverns. Assuming you’re just a bit of a jerk.

It’s that most wonderful time of the year! The holiday when families come together and induldge in colourful capitalism. That’s right, I’m talking about Economic Hex-Based Tile Laying Game Fest: 2013. In this year’s hex fest we review the moreish Suburbia, the quaint Keyflower, remember the daring Archipelago, and in doing so unearth our Game of the Year. Pour yourself a glass of hexnog, dear viewer. Tis’ the season!