Board as Hell

In which the royal table is set, alliances are forged, a witch sneezes, and a flagon of apple juice is revealed to be something else altogether.

In which the fierce progeny of our wise counsel take charge, a centaur provides nourishment, severed heads are consulted, and a brigand's manhood is removed in a most surprising fashion!

In which a desperate thief meets a merciful end, much "potion" is imbibed, a treat known as "Some More Ofs" is concocted, and each family gets fisted in turn.

In which our wise council debates going to war, a clown misplaces their mirth, a helmet is greased, and the reckless imbibing of "potions" clearly begins to take its toll.

In which family is cherished, face paint is donned, the Faygo flows like honeyed wine, and we all learn of these mysterious "magnets" and how they work.

I'm going to be honest with you guys, if any of these hooligans ever run for office I am packing my bags and heading for Canada.

I cry your mercy, can someone point me in the direction of ye olde privy. I've needed to go to seige for ages if you know what I mean.

The glutton who hath MUK-ed is later destined for quite a BANG in ye olde privy. - Medieval Proverb