Skyrim For Pimps

Skyrim for Pimps is back, right where it left off..sort of. Enter our new character, S'oggy Balls.

S'oggy Balls tries to make new friends.

'oggy Balls tries to get a girlfriend and becomes a catdog in the process.

S'oggy Balls has WAY too much skooma, but in the end gets a new buddy.

Our intrepid hero S'oggyballs is on a mission to slay a great white beast! Along the way he has a Werewolf party, choke-slams some dipshits, and learns just how powerful his little buddy General Burnside actually is.

It's Turkey Time in Skyrim! General Burnside loves turkey. S'oggyballs gets high on Skooma, kills a few witches, and tragedy befalls Kornsack... Cognac... Kodak... Whatever his name is.

S'oggyballs and his fellow companions wipe out the Silver Hand, then reforge the Wuuthrad. It's super exciting, you won't want to miss it!

S'oggyballs finally tricks Aela in to touching his special kitty parts. He plays a prank on Farkas, and encounters some strange people and goes to Riften. Lots of people die.

S'oggyballs joins the Thieves Guild and continues his trickery and mischief. Then people die.

S'oggyballs helps Aela get new outfits and then is sent by the Thieves Guild to complete a mission by breaking in to some homes. S'oggy finds thieving to have a lot less body slamming and killing than he was hoping.

S'oggyballs continues his quest to be the best thief, but he's still not sure about the rules regarding smashing people.

S'oggyballs smashes some stupid people and encounters a weird lady.

S'oggyballs decides to pull off the crime of the century. Then moves on to the quest to feed General Burnside.

S'oggyballs "writes" a letter to Ysolda to learn how to read.

S'oggyballs is forced to get sneakier when he must follow Gulum-Ei. Naturally, he's very subtle.

S'oggyballs discovers a magical weapon, and throws it away. He then writes a very special letter to his pal, Ysolda.

S'oggyballs follows Mercer Frey and hears a tale, the tale of the greatest hand job ever given.

S'oggyballs encounters Crotch Guzzler for the first time. He then goes on his way to learn to read.

S'oggyballs runs into some drunk douchebag, tries to find Mercer Frey's hidden stash of adult magazines, and General Burnside goes crazy on Ice Cream!

S'oggy breaks into a suspicious cupboard and finds the makings for secret cake. And then he tries vainly to hear what Karliah is saying.

S'oggy defeats Mercer Frey in a battle of the century and then attends to blissful union of his good friend Ysolda and an asshole.

S'oggy is now the leader of the thieves guild, a "crappy" desk job. He decides to go searching for Nocturnal, the hot nasty god of kink.

S'oggy returns to Elsweyr only to find that all his fellow Khajiit have taken some really bad skooma.

Soggy gets his own airship dirigible and continues to try to improve the drugs his fellow khajiit shoot up.

Soggy gets his own airship dirigible and continues to try to improve the drugs his fellow khajiit shoot up.

Soggy completes his adventure in Elswyr and begins to return to Skyrim...

Soggy completes his adventure in Elswyr and begins to return to Skyrim...

S'oggy discovered what happened to his brother, J'zargo, and, by Sithis, vows revenge!

S'oggy Balls attempts to learn how to kill a Dragonborn from Paarthurnax, a dragon.

The story ends....

The story returns...briefly...

The story returns...briefly...again...

The story returns...briefly...again...once more...