Shaturday Morning Cartoons

The Shat Squad - Joe, Nick, George and Caitlin - kick off season 4 of the show with NBC's 1974 Saturday morning preview special hosted by the youngest Osmond, Jimmy, and produced by Sid and Marty Krofft. See previews for Wheelie & The Chopper Bunch, Land of the Lost, Sigmund & The Sea Monsters, Emergency +4, and Run, Joe, Run, in between a lot of lame patter, problematic musical numbers, and pretty cool marionettes! Plus, 70s commercials with groovy songs, a game show about younger brothers, and the reveal of Cookie Madison's new Shaturday comic book.

Join three hideously deformed creatures of superhuman size and strength (Nick, George, and Josh from Lunchmeat VHS) to watch the 1991 animated series Toxic Crusaders. This inexplicable spin-off of The Toxic Avenger, Troma's cartoonishly violent, live-action cult classic from 1984, has everything kids want: sadistic bullying, disfiguring mutations, fourth-wall-bustin' violence, and toxic waste disposal logistics. You'll also see zany eco-commercials of the 90s and play America's new favorite game show: Toxic Toys for Tots. So meet us in Hordak's Slime Pit and get ready for a 'toon so good, it's good!

This week on Shaturday, Nick, Joe and George welcome actor/voiceover artist/dope slanger Jason Griffith to watch a recently unearthed episode of the 1984 toon, Wolf Rock TV, starring radio legend Wolfman Jack. Plus, commercials featuring wolves and an impression game called "Wolfman Jack Off!" Oh yeah, baby! Ah-woooo!

Once McDonald's made their trillionth dollar, they did what any massive corporation would do...they made cartoons! This morning the SMC pals watch a rare McDonald's cartoon played for birthday partiers in McDonald's Playlands in the late 80s. Ronald, The Hamburglar, Grimace and that one bird all partake on a mercifully short "adventure" with a kooky professor. But the most exciting adventure comes when special guest Tim Harrod (Bastard Tapes, The Onion) goes up against master impressionist, Nick Prueher in an Ed Wynn-off.

The sentient apes of Shaturday welcome author and Planet of the Apes scholar Scott Raile to watch the 1975 cartoon, "Return to the Planet of the Apes." We see apes in nightcaps, Charlton Heston in a tracksuit, and a boom-a-rangutan. Thank for watching and god damn you all to hell, Welkers!

Once in a great while, the Shaturday Gang takes in a cartoon that's actually good. And this week, we watch what may well be the best 'toon of the 1980s. It's G.I. Joe's 1985 story arc "There's No Place Like Springfield" smuggled onto YouTube by way of Britain's lightly redubbed version known as Action Force. It's so disturbing, enveloping, and trippy you'll wonder how it ever aired. But then you'll get the inside scoop in an interview with renowned voice actor Neil Ross. If you think this toon is mind-melting, wait until you see his resume. Plus: even though Joe's not here, you'll get a shocking demonstration of dental body horror in his honor. Yo, Joe!

Halloween's craziest game show returns for its most unhinged episode yet! Compete with the Shaturday Gang as they try to identify crappy Halloween masks of '70s and '80s, often futilely. This year, the gloves are off and the weaseling is on. New rules, new categories, and a new Big Board heat the cauldron of trash talk to a frothy boil. It's tax free, fat free, and fancy free. It's Mask Me Another!

Vroom! Vroom! Join Joe, Nick, George, Caitlin, and lifelong monster truck fan Brien Kielb as they watch the action-packed 1985 toon, "Bigfoot and the Monster Machines." Get a look at Brien's rare monster truck memorabilia and play along with a game show based on our favorite character name of all time, Yank Justice.

The Shaturday crew takes a much needed break from plot and character development to focus their attention on arguably the best part of any cartoon: the opening theme song! Joe wrangles up a handful of obscure theme songs as the crew tap their toes

It's holiday time and the Shaturday Boyz welcome best-selling children's author and illustrator Peter Brown (The Wild Robot) to watch the 1980 Berenstain Bears Thanksgiving special. Plus, we settle the Berenstain vs Berenstein debate once and for all, watch some puzzling Thanksgiving TV promos, and play a game called Mandela Effect or Mandala Effect. So remember his name. His name is Bigpaw!

Emergencies can be a real drag sometimes, but they're way more fun when cartoon extraordinaire , Roy MIles joins you. Based on the 1970s live action show, "Emergency!", this cartoon version features four kids who find themselves in action-packed adventures on a daily basis and apparently don't have to go to school.

This week, Director Steve joins the Shaturday Boys for a quest into Dragon's Lair, the Ruby-Spears version of the ground-breaking arcade game. Just as laserdiscs briefly wrestled for control of the video game industry, Nick and Joe battle it out like it's a run-of-the-mill episode of VCR Party Live. Plus, they watch commercials for swords and sorcery games, play a spot-the-fake D&D module quiz, and sample some top shelf Travalena for the holidays. So place your quarters on the arcade cabinet, because you're next.

The Legion of Shat presents: Shows We Can't Show, Volume 1. We smuggle in the Super Friends by watching a few choice clips plucked from its legendary 93-episode run. Meanwhile, at the Hall of Justice, you'll learn the secret origin of Batman's secret origin, hear Joe admire the Scarecrow, get details about Caitlin's forthcoming book, find out how the series broke George's brain, and watch Nick endure yet another unending episode. You'll get light-hearted cartoon bloopers and profane Top 40 freak-outs. And that's just from Casey Kasem! This one has it all: Batman crying, Superman dying, and, of course, the Waynes getting shot. That's if it airs... (it did... briefly)

Join Joe, Nick, George and Caitlin as they ask they watch the final episode of the 1982 NBC cartoon, "The Gary Coleman Show," based on the TV movie, "The Kid with the Broken Halo." Then ask yourself, "What's your Gary Coleman experience?" Plus, play along with a game where you try and decipher Todd Bridges' modulated voice in "Whatchu Really Talking About, Willis?"

Join Joe-Man, Nickor, and George-at-Arms as they welcome Nick Mayor and Jen Lemasters from Bric-A-Brac Records to watch the 1985 Masters of the Universe Christmas special. We cut it down from one hour to 20 minutes but it'll still feel like "Eternia." Plus, increasingly desperate He-Man commercials and a game called "Real or Faker" featuring Nick and Jen's incredible collectibles.

The Shaturday Kids trip out on the counterproductive 1990 anti-drug special Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue with a live audience. Get ready for the Smurfs, Muppet Babies, Garfield, ALF, Slimer, and way too many more. Plus: Nick bring a hunk mug! Caitlin makes a Ziggy cake! George pontificates! And Joe goes to the hospital! Then, Nick gets everyone high with a game show about cartoon drugs. So Just Say Yes to some of the coolest psychedelic sequences Saturday mornings ever saw.

The Shaturday Boys convene a solemn President's Day caucus to watch an obscure cartoon few have ever heard of: 1967's Super President. The creators of the Pink Panther present President James Norcross, who transforms into a bulletproof superhero while his trusty yet fretful sidekick, Jerry Sales, squirms nearby. The Shatty Gang then enters its second term by saluting a succession of patriotically insane President's Day commercials. Finally, FFF's finest face off in a riveting trivia game about the myriad menageries of our chief executives. If you're a future historian looking for the episode where Nick makes nonstop TMBG references, this is it!

The Shaturday Gang is back and preparing for Super Tuesday with DIC's understandably obscure 1989 reboot of G.I. Joe. Prepare to vote your fond memories of Marvel/Sunbow's G.I. Joe cartoon out of office as the penny-pinchers at DIC offer a new and not particularly well-designed collection of good guys and bad guys. Today's episode features a kidnapped female president, a mysterious superhero, Millard Fillmore, and yet another Geraldo Rivera proxy. The Shat Kids also watch zany, terrifying, and/or undignified campaign commercials, and then get quizzed on fictional Presidents in comics and cartoons. So shat early and shat often!

This week, Nick, Joe, George and Caitlin make your sweet ass dreams come true with an episode of the forgotten 1986 cartoon, MoonDreamers. Part of Hasbro's My Little Pony 'n Friends lineup, with an accompanying glow-in-the-dark toy line, this one didn't light the world on fire, but we think it's worth another look, if only to try and spot a character's genitals. Plus, George serves up commercials for glow-in-the-dark toys and we take a quiz about the 1987 Sears Wishbook.

Chabadah chabadah and top of the morning to you! The Shaturday crew cues up a St. Patrick's Day episode of the forgotten Hanna-Barbera cartoon, Cattanooga Cats, about a quartet of hillbilly felines who play in a band. Makes total sense, right? In this episode, they travel to Ireland and encounter a "Wee Greenie Goofie." Then, George spotlights questionable Irish accents in local commercials and we play a game show called "Name That Toon Band."

If you like human/insect hybrids, you'll go buggy for Sectaurs, the short-lived 1985 cartoon featuring the ill-fated Coleco toyline. Puppeteer, toymaker, and animation aficionado Roy Miles returns to help the Shaturday Boys investigate why this action-packed mini-series crawled into semi-obscurity. Along the way, they'll find animated whips, weeping insects, and 976 puppets, as well as pancakes, C.H.U.D.s, and makeshift fleshlights. If that's not enough - and it is - they'll also watch 1980's fundamentalists denouncing Sectaurs toys... while gleefully playing with them. So hop on your tele-bonded insectoid and meet us in the Acid Desert for some top-shelf shat.

This week, Nick, Joe, George and Caitlin resurrect an obscure 1974 cartoon produced by Lutherans called "Easter Is." It's mostly about a kid who neglects a dog named Waldo but it gets Jesus-y at the end. Plus, highlights from Easter Seals telethons from years past, and a game show based on the Oriental Trading Company's religious party supply catalog.

Brace yourself for a Shaturday milestone! For the first time ever, the Welkerinos watch every single episode of this short-lived shat-toon, featuring all the mask-pulling-off endings.

The Shaturday Boys invite Overlord's drummer Matt to watch 1981's Blackstar, yet another sci-fi/fantasy 'toon featuring a scantily clad dude with a sword. Yes, Filmation poured Conan the Barbarian, John Carter of Mars, and The Hobbit into a blender, yielding a frothy puree of surprisingly sensual shat. The guys then watch commercials of other obscure Galoob action figures before facing off in a cutthroat game of animated sword identification. All this, plus incredible new Frank Welker information! In the immortal words of John Blackstar: "I'm John Blackstar."

This week, we go wiggy as Nick's sister, Jessica Rausch, joins us to watch a 1974 cartoon about three bears trying to escape from a zoo. Sound like every other Hanna-Barbera cartoon from that era? It is, right down to ripping off a popular live-action sitcom from the era (The Phil Silvers Show). Plus, we watch a commercial break from the USA Cartoon Express, play a game called "Help! It's the Hair BLUR Bunch," and George brings up Rick Wakeman twice.

The Shaturday Boys welcome Joe's brother (and author), Alex Pickett, to not only watch highlights of animated John Candy in campground distress, but to investigate a family secret that Alex has been holding onto since he was 10 years old. Plus George serves up a batch of shat-vertisments featuring John Candy's less popular movies.

This week, the Shaturday Boys invite Director Steve Lawrence, the Alan Smithee of VCR Party Live, to endure 1990's Computer Warriors, the understandably forgotten cartoon pilot for the understandably forgotten Mattel toy. The fellas ponder 90s computing, lamentable raps, product placement, and peeing robots while watching what can be charitably described as reverse-Tron Transformers. Then they screen commercials for obscure computers before playing a rousing game of What's This Dongle Do? So hold on to your shat... It's Toon Time!

This week, the Shaturday crew is joined by legendary comedy writer Tom Gammill (The Simpsons, Curb Your Enthusiasm) to watch two animated shorts based on the comic strip Nancy. How do Nancy's 69 hair spikes fare in cartoon form? Not well! Plus, George brings us commercials featuring famous and semi-famous Nancys and Joe serves up a game show called "Comic Strip Kidz Say the Darndest Things In Their Talk Bubbles."

With Shaturday's own gross creature Joe out of town, Nick, George and Caitlin rewind back to 1987 for the VHS-only MADBALLS cartoon! Plus, a final installment of commercials for gross toys and a game about gendered gross toy commercials called, "Does It Pass the Blecchdel Test?"

This week, the Shaturday Boys are joined by New York Times best-selling author Mike Sacks, who walks us though the dark recesses of Jerry Lewis's life and career in between clips from the 1970 cartoon, "Will the Real Jerry Lewis Please Sit Down?" Plus, commercials that Jerry Lewis doesn't remember doing, rare footage from The Day the Clown Cried, and a game called "Will the Fake Jerry Lewis Movie Please Sit Down?"

The Shaturday Boys invite writer/comedian/friend of the show(?) Mike Drucker to watch 1984's Pole Position, a cartoon series very loosely based on Namco's classic arcade driving game. Talking cars, dead parents, Cold War espionage, and a monkey/raccoon hybrid make for a surprisingly sophisticated kids' show. Then fasten your seatbelts for breakdancing commercials, sexy arcade flyers, and a quiz about early racing games. Plus, in the final lap, the shocking return of a celebrated Plunkett. Think you can handle it? Prepare to Qualify!

This week, Keith Garcia from Denver Film joins us to watch a potentially very gay episode of the Dungeons & Dragons cartoon. Plus, we watch commercials for D&D knockoffs, George has a shaving accident, and Keith takes the hot seat in "OK, But Are They?," where we finally get to learn the sexual orientations of creatures in the 1977 Monster Manual!

Last year, the Shaturday Gang received a comic book in the mail from New Zealand featuring THEM! It was written and illustrated by a mysterious person named Cookie and it was INCREDIBLE! With the help of professional voice actor, Jason Griffith (Sonic The Hedgehog), the crew embarks on a comic book table read for the AGES!