The Unbiased History of Rome

The true History of Rome begins here. From the Sack of Troy, Aeneas will brave the Mediterranean, forever enrage Dido, f*ck about in Alba longa, eventually give rise to Romulus and Remus, and from there on it's all about wolves, barbarians, and glory

The REX ROMANVM went from Romulus, Numa, Titus Hostilius, Ancus Marcius, Tarquin, Tarquinius,, Servius Tullius, Superbus. There's r*pe, violence, and barbarity all around. Some Aqueducts here, wars there, you'll get used to it

Here we cover the legendary lives of both Cincinnatus and Camillus, as they deal with Secession of the Plebs, Sack Veii, and survive the Gallic Sack of Rome by Brennus

The Roman Conquest of Italy included the Samnite Wars, the transition to the Maniple System (Hastati, Principe, Triarii, Maniples, etc), one Roman Defeat, yes, and Pyrrhus of Epirus

The Punics Wars was a life and death conflict between the noble romans and vile Punics. Dispersed into three brutal wars, here lies the tales of Scipio, Hannibal, Fabian, and the salty sack of Carthage Posted a day earlier, cause f*ck mondays, f*ck punics, f*ck trannies and most of all: f*ck iberian jannies

The Roman Republic has been corrupted, with the populares and Optimates clashing for supremacy. These are the days of Sulla, Gaius Marius, and the birth of Pompey, Crassus, and Julius Caesar, among them involved in the Cimbrian Wars, Mithridatic Wars, and with Mithridates himself

Julius Caesar, Crassus, and Pompey follow up on Sulla's struggles, laying Siege of Jerusalem, crushing Spartacus' revolt (Third Servile War,), fighting the Sertorian War, and Mithridates in the Third Mithridatic War. These, are the closing days of the Late Republic.

The life story of Gaius Julius Caesar is a long, glorious one. Forever the bane of moralist revisionists, here lies the true tale of the greatest of the Romans. From Caesar's Gallic Wars to Caesar's civil wars, involving all places and people, among them Alesia, Vercingetorix, Cato, Cicero, Mark Anthony, Cleopatra, the list is long. He will restore the Republic to it's prime by force, and be assassinated while trying.

A V E * C A E S A R, also Activate Windows Augustus, born Octavian, was the first Emperor of the Roman Empire. As the divine descendant of Aeneas, and Julius' Caesar's chosen heir, Octavian will rescue a decadent Rome, and usure in the Pax Romana. With the likes of Agrippa, Virgil, and Maecenas on his side, he will endure endless wars, misery, barbarity, and treachery on the way, from Cleopatra, Mark Anthony, Quintillius Varus, Arminius and so on. This, the birth of the Roman Empire

As Augustus leaves the empire to his surviving heirs, we now cover the remains of the Julian-Claudian Dynasty, from Tiberius to Caligula, Claudius, and finally Nero. These were crazy times, one could even say... Mad.

“Unbiased History” is a work of historical parody. It seeks nothing, but to provide a severely distorted, and outright false rendition of historical events, producing heavily biased narratives for lighthearted critical reflection, and with luck, comedic effect. It neither holds, advocates, or encourages the adoption of any real life political or social stances, most especially those deemed hateful and/or threatening to human rights. Any comments, associations, or actions condoning any form of hate-speech declared unacceptable by the website and/or the comments’ moderators shall be removed and/or unmade. Let’s try to all get along, but without having to sacrifice our ability to joke about each others stereotypes, faults, and misery. However, dark humor about sensitive topics, and dog-whistling extremist ideologies are often hard topics to draw a line in between. This channel will act in such a manner as to, hopefully, not be mistaken with the latter. I plea for all parties involved, viewers and moderators alike, to consider this disclaimer before reaching any final conclusions. Thanks for reading, and more so for understanding.

It’s time for a CELEBRATION, my dear plebs.