When Jim learns that the Americans have taken oven a local airfield and a Headmaster is needed to teach their children, he offers his services. Unfortunately, his Chiselbury contract can’t be broken unless he is dismissed for gross moral turpitude.

Crombie overhears a conversation about a schoolboy taking his teacher to court for excessive cruelty. After receiving six of the best, he too brings his case before a magistrate, alleging that Prof. Edwards administered 347 whacks!

Jim allows his boys to become guinea pigs for St. Tallulah’s girls’ cookery class, believing it will become useful as a threat. When the meal turns into a success, the threat becomes an incentive for hand work before the inspector’s visit.

The governor’s chartered accountant nephew, examining the accounts, finds a cash box with £30 missing. To replace the money, Prof. Edwards takes over Crombie and Potter’s insur­ance scheme against whacking.

Jim attempts to fund an advertising campaign for new pupils. A commercial is filmed, but must be scrapped when the son of a BBC governor is sent to Chiselbury.

Pettigrew has promised Mr. Dinwiddie a cottage for his long service present, and the Headmaster decides a hit tune for the school will bring in the loot. Vera Lynn is persuaded to come and sing The Chiselbury Boating Song at Dinwiddie’s bedside, unaware that her performance is being recorded!