Duncan's Thai Kitchen

Duncan travels to the beaches of Thailand and visits the bustling night markets in Hua Hin and Chantaburi.

Duncan travels north to Bangkok and cooks a roasted red duck curry at a royal residence. After an opium binge, Duncan stumbles around the main thoroughfares of the city gorging himself on street food.

Duncan finds himself being chased on the set of Mission Impossible's filming location at Samut Songkhram. After losing a foot to the local criminal element that paroles the famed floating market, Duncan hobbles around begging for aide and bandages but is only fed the famous Boat Noodles. Apparently they were organic.

Continuing his tour of famous movie sets, Duncan travels to Kanchanaburi to visit Bridge Over the River Kwai. Duncan is suffering a viral attack on the leg where his foot was removed by gangsters. Inspired by his own pain, Duncan makes a fiery red curry with river prawns the size of pineapples.

Duncan travels back to Eastern Thailand being dragged behind a two-stroke 49cc motorized bike. His body is scraped and bruised from the trip, but he's still dreaming of those oversized prawns. Duncan scours the seafood market of Ang Thong and pesters all of the merchants pleading with them to give him prawns. Unsuccessful, Duncan is asked to reflect on his broken life at Pra Saat Hin, a site of sacred ruins and hobbled dreams. Refreshed, Duncan shows us another dish with those prawns.

Bored out of his mind, Duncan crab walks backwards to his base village in Phimai. When he gets there, he sees nothing but majestic fields of rice that drive him a little stir-crazy. He breaks free of his mania by cooking for his crime syndicate family and other people of the village.

Like a common tourist, Duncan visits the Mighty Mighty Mekong River Marauders (Rugby 7 team). Inspired by the rough canvas of the Australian rugby shorts, Duncan makes a wild chicken curry en Papillote (French for "cooked in rugby shorts") as he drinks in the beauty of the Moonlight Waterfalls. Local police ask Duncan to move along as they have reports of a Peeping Tom near the famous natural monument.

Duncan's noodle fever dreams haunt his evenings so he heads to Udon Thani to find sweet (and spicy) relief. Near the Great Lotus-1-2-3 Spreadsheet Lake, Duncan does some dumpster diving and also skims off fresh lotus from the polluted lake. He shows us the secrets of Yum Dok Mai and starts injecting fish sauce since his opium supply has run dry.

Suffering massively from withdrawal, Duncan seeks out local herbal tea to help him with the Yellow Fever he has contracted. A small farmer chases Duncan off of his land but not before Duncan can steal some rare Blue Butterfly Pea - an insect crossed with a legume. This is the perfect complement to his (koi?) fish in coconut.

Traveling over the same route as Jean-Claude Van Damme in Kickboxer, Duncan is drawn to the ancient city of Sukhothai to save a street worker who was abducted by rogue elements of his crime syndicate family. To appease the ancient gods that haunt this 800 year old spook fest, Duncan wisely chooses to make an innovative fish fried rice.

Duncan runs into Forrest Whitaker in an opium den. Forrest reaches out to the heavens and moves Duncan to tears. Fueled by Ramen (and other angst pop music), Duncan travels to the vibrant city of Chiang Mai to bust an illegal smuggling ring specializing in kangaroo meat. Entangled in local politics, Duncan finds himself pleading with the Thai Ambassador to Australia. The two bond over a 24 pack off Singha and decide to make or climb Doi Ang Khang.

After leaving the Eurasian Tectonic Plate, Thailand finds itself returning like the Prodigal Land Mass. Duncan celebrates the epic journey by buying up fancy ingredients from local markets and the immediately setting everything on fire in a banana leaf. Duncan looks back on his remarkable journey and opines for his missing foot. Good luck Duncan and don't choke on purple Thai Basil, it is considered poisonous by the locals.