Decker Shado

The last review of Dinocember would happen to be.. The Last Dinosaur! Uploaded just in time to.. be... past December. Every time zone in fact. Well crud. Point is, this is a review of a film from 1977 that was a joint production between American and Japanese filmmakers. Sounds like the perfect "preparing for Japan" film to review and round off Dinocember!

I've fixed many a problem with my recording setup, and as a result have a comparatively smoother gameplay experience! Also I am much more visible, so you can watch me drool on my desk. And we shoot people in this episode! ..what?

Yes, I played for damn near 50 minutes and did not run into a single Xenomorph. Well, a dead facehugger, but that's it. Who needs Xenos for company though, when you can watch characters run through walls and other various clipping problems?

The shit has officially hit the fan. You can tell by the use of a dance number to call for evacuation. You might be wondering why Weyland-Yutani fired on the other ship to the point of it exploding if causing it to explode would destroy the very ship they were on as well.. you see, there's your problem. Don't think!

Holy crap! We're on LV-426! Hadley's Hope! So much Aliens geeking out to be done! Now if only something exciting would happen..

The "adventure" continues back into the sewers. And would you look at that? There's a new breed of alien waddling up to us... I will call him... Derpy!

How do you top what is arguably one the the smartest and perhaps even the best action movies of all time? Well you don't, so don't bother trying. Instead, make something like Die Hard 2, which is fully aware that it is a sequel to a movie that it cannot possibly beat, and is totally fine with that. That's not to say the movie isn't great itself, but... well.. I articulate myself a hell of a lot better on camera, it seems.

Oh my! The Xenomorph is ready to birth! That means Bella might just DIE! What shall happen now? Take a wild guess.

So we walk through more boring hallways. Oh, and the derelict spaceship! Now augmented with new, boring platforms and hallways. Forget all of that, we finally find out WHO IS THE MYSTERY MARINE? You know, like they told us as soon as we hit "play."

Picking up where we left off, we learn we didn't leave off where we actually were. Also, things don't actually have to hit you to still hit you.

Well, it's almost over and we do SO MUCH in this part.. run through more recycled levels, fight far more enemies of all kinds.. see the Queen Xenomorph and have a stand off! The thing I remember most fondly however, is that the framerate is still ass.

It all comes down to this.. even though a bunch of us made it on the ship, it is somehow just a battle between Winter and a Queen Xenomorph. Lucky for him, she can't access 40% of the arena and armor pickups respawn. Oh, and he doesn't even have to shoot her to death, just do a series of levers. That's exciting, right?

Let's try something off the wall today. A classic horror review! For this, we take a look at Motel Hell, a dark comedy with a twisted backstory about Rory Calhoun cookin' up some peculiar treats while maintaining a farm and running a motel. How many incomes does the son of a bitch need?

It's close to the deadline for Gamerathon 3 fundraising, and that means it's time to rattle off what has been accomplished thus far, and how far we've got to go. Also, who wants a T-Shirt?

Long time no see, Seagal. This week, we take a look at the final movie of a set produced by Warner Bros as a contract deal with Steven Seagal. As it did extremely poorly, they weren't too keen to sign him up for any more films after this. However, what is the quality of said movie?

I've done an awful lot of Japanese movie reviews with Creepy.. more often than not, Kaiju flicks. This is a very well known genre, and is often parodied.. but what happens when you have a kaiju themed mockumentary made in Japan? Well, Big Man Japan happens.

Next time you are frightened by a spider on the wall, just be glad you haven't found yourself on Klandathu. In this review of Starship Troopers, we take a look at the extreme political angles, deep subtext and meaning.. and promptly pay no mind to any of it cause it's just a goddamn sci-fi action flick.

The sequel to Starship Troopers, subtitled "Hero of the Federation" was a... the guys were trying to... there's... oh the hell with it. I can't even begin to imagine how in the hell this got greenlit.

The third and final live action Starship Troopers movie, Marauder sought to bring the series back from the dark, dark low budget hell of Hero of the Federation. How'd they do? Well.. they got 2 million more dollars and also went straight to DVD. However, they managed to prove why a low budget and DVD release are no excuse for poor visual quality! They also stand as a prime example of how to alienate 100% of your audience.

A whole lot have bad has happened in a very short span of time.I absolutely hate having to ask this of everyone, as you all have done so much for me already, but please hear me out and let me know what can be done.

In very short order, the trip to Japan got saved from the jaws of failure thanks to the actions of YOU great people! It may be premature to say everything is fine now, but as you have raised enough to cover what caused the crisis in the first place, I feel everyone deserves to know that the target was met.

This month's Japanese movie review is.. Fanservice Forces vs Spacetime Jigglies! Or.. Travelers: Dimension Police. Close enough, as this multidimensional crime mystery science fiction flick seems far more interested in covering every inch of the leading lady's shapely figure in quite a lot of detail. How much fanservice then, you ask? More than the Cutey Honey movie. Way more.

Missing in action, there is a concern as to what the current state of the Creepy one is. In hopes to alleviate some of the concern, I give you this small update video.

Eight Legged Freaks brings two things to my mind. One, the idea of normal bugs giant sized killing dozens of people is so simple.. yet seems to entertain me very much. Two, I wish someone would do this with more convincing special effects, because these bugs.. well.. in still images they're okay. I guess.. but in animation, if you don't nail the natural movement it just looks silly. Did I mention these talk like evil chipmunks?

With spring break approaching, and Cancun around the corner.. why not remind everyone about the massive fish with the jaws of death? No no, not from Jaws. That's a review for another day... today, we look at Deep Blue Sea, a tale of killer sharks but they get away with the fact that real sharks aren't so psycho because these are MUTANT sharks! Who knew genetic manipulation would turn sharks psycho like a slasher killer?

In Die Hard 3: Die Hard with a Vengeance, we see that officer John McClaine of the NYPD has actually left the LAPD and come back to the NYPD! ...but there's no explanation as to how. Screw it, Samuel L Jackson is in this film! Also explosions, and Scar.

Been a long time coming, with SO MUCH on the plate right now. Nevertheless, here's an update for all those donating via Patreon. Things I forgot to mention: The milestone goals we hit that meant I had to make bonus videos DO still apply. I still owe you all quite a few videos, and autographs. Hopefully once returning from Japan, that can be focused on and taken care of. I'll say this much: I'm not going to have any more big projects requiring huge funding before getting ALL those bonuses squared away.

Hey, it's the monthly reminder for the Patreon campaign to make Gamerathon 3! ...wait a minute, shouldn't I already be in Japan?

Trying to get everything going, working hard to get Gamerathon 3 recorded as well as this zany adventure I strangely am having in Japan. This means I can't edit videos before returning, but hopefully you won't mind accepting this as a tideover until I return to the states.

Just got back from Japan, and that means.. it's time to get back to work! As again the reviews are suffering a delay due to all this, I bring you.. me. Hopefully to explain how things are, and catch any who are available to ask questions.

So by now everyone knows I went to Japan, and brought a bunch of cameras with me. It's nice to show I did a little something other than just walk around with them in my bags and go home.

It's finally HERE! The first week's review of Gamerathon 3, Gamera VS Guiron! Watch in awe as Creepy and I tackle the classic Japanese film from Japan! ...in a hotel room. ...that we never leave... *cough* Well things could have gone better, but we've got a review to do, dangit!

The adventure through Japan continues! And continues.. and continues.. and continues.. please dear god somebody kill me... and it continues.

Another Gamera movie, another wildly designed monster for him to battle! Thus, we meet Jiger. Hailing from Wester Island but bent on destroying the Osaka World Expo '70 that has so many great things you should really check out, only Gamera can save the world...'s fair! But who can save Gamera? A couple kids. No surprises there...

As the journey through Japan continues, Creepy and I find ourselves getting quite familiar with nighttime activities across much of the country. Mainly the lack of said activities past 1am, but still.

Hey, it's May! Therefore it's time for May's reviews. Don't worry, Gamerathon 3 will be finished. I just want to make sure I won't be behind on videos. Nevertheless, this week's review is 2007's Live Free or Die Hard. Starring Bruce Willis as John McClain, this was the first entry in the series in quite a long time. In fact, Bruce is looking quite a bit older.. because.. well, he is. But that's not important. What is, is how good the movie may or may not be...

In a world where both of our monsters are totally underwater, Gamera VS Zigra does the unimaginable... alien kaiju doing battle at a heavily commercialized area! ..oh, wait. :| Yes, this is Gamera VS Zigra, brought to you by Seaworld.. pretty obviously. This also marks the last Gamera film in the Showa era.. that is, until Gamera Super Monster....

Review will be later than usual. So much so, I made a video about it! ...crap. Also, if you read dates as day/month/year, than this is a video... FROM THE FUTURE! wait.. does that mean I'll still have videos coming late, that far out? Shit, that's a raw deal.

Been a long time since a "how the heck did this get past the planning stages?" movie review, hasn't it? Fortunately, we can always look towards the sci-fi channel.. or.. syfy? whatever they're calling themselves these days. Nevertheless, this is Convict 762, the story of a group of space ladies who wind up finding out that the only men in the movie are psychotic killers. Whoops...

It's time to take a ride on the nightmare merry go round.. and that theme song will be stuck in my head for the next 40 years. Nevertheless, this week's review is Killer Klowns From Outer Space. It's a story about a town's awkward adjustment phase as it accommodates a new population of clown people with certain needs. They do this by dying.. a lot.

Damn that's a long video title. Anyhow, there were quite a few things I found out about Return of the Killer Klowns From Outer Space in 3D when I was researching the original, and there's quite a bit on my mind I'd like to let out. Thus, I made this video. And now we understand...

What do you do when you want to make a big Gamera movie but you have no budget to speak of? ...I suppose I should already know the answer to that, but you could also churn out Gamera Super Monster. Or the Japanese title, 宇宙怪獣ガメラ (Space Monster Gamera) where a Gamera doll does battle with a miniature star destroyer for 90 minutes, as a combination of stock footage and girls in tights running around playgrounds tries to distract us. I wish I was making any of that up.

Back in 1982, sometimes it still looked like 1973, and when that happened.. SERIAL KILLERS WERE ON THE LOOSE! As we see in this week's review, The New York Ripper. It's about a guy who goes around New York stabbing young women to death, whom the police refer to as "the ripper." Sound familiar? Well this guy quacks like a duck, which makes it totally different. Though that doesn't exactly help...

The final film in the Die Hard franchise, at least as of this writing but also pretty probable considering what the hell they did to it.. A Good Day to Die Hard gives us two times the McClaines, nuclear weapons, Russian politics, and somehow this can only fill out a 90 minute running time. That's a great sign, isn't it?

Back in 2009, someone finally thought to make a live action adaptation of Dragonball. By that of course, I mean make an action flick with special effects and slap the Dragonball name on it. Oh, it's got characters, and even some situations familiar in the series, but surely no one watching a Dragonball movie cares if it feels uniquely like Dragonball, do they? So how do you make it more accessible? Make it like any other movie ever. Think I'm exaggerating? Goku's in high school.

What do you do when you need a Jurassic Park mockbuster, but The Asylum hasn't been founded yet? Call the Cormans, of course! This brings us Carnosaur, a film adaptation of the novel Carnosaur, which is as much an adaptation of that as Dragonball Evolution was an adaptation of Dragonball. Still, as an original production, how does it stand up?

Quick update to let everyone know about a little bump in the road, and measures that can be done to help mitigate the potential "worst case scenario." Here's hoping things work out properly before such an event takes place.. but just in case.

How do you follow up a story quite as crazy as Carnosaur? Simple! Discard absolutely everything except for one shred so you can prove what you are making really is a sequel, and save even more money by using a script that everyone already knows! This brings us Carnosaur 2, a Roger Corman production that.. seems pretty damn similar to something else I know...

How do you follow up a story quite as crazy as Carnosaur? Simple! Discard absolutely everything except for one shred so you can prove what you are making really is a sequel, and save even more money by using a script that everyone already knows! This brings us Carnosaur 2, a Roger Corman production that.. seems pretty damn similar to something else I know...

Things are happening a tad faster than originally planned, but the point is I now have a sub-channel dedicated to gaming. This means I can do the Alien Isolation Let's Play without it hurting my algorithms like the Aliens Colonial Marines Let's Play did. In this kerfuffle, I'm also trying to figure out the optimal amount of time to spend per week on let's play videos, while still providing the same amount of movie reviews as always. (also small update, submitting a support ticket worked! It took a week, but my let's plays are now monetized. I no longer live in Afghanistan.. that's a relief.)

The career of Sylvester Stallone is an interesting tale... so why not explore one of his earliest works? No, not that! The one that shot him into stardom, a movie he wrote his damn self: Rocky! It's a semi-autobiographical work, with Stallone depicting his own life struggles as instead the struggles of a low ranking boxer. Also, the line most people remember is "ADRIAAAAAN!" although when you actually see the movie, you start to understand why...

The career of Sylvester Stallone is an interesting tale... so why not explore one of his earliest works? No, not that! The one that shot him into stardom, a movie he wrote his damn self: Rocky! It's a semi-autobiographical work, with Stallone depicting his own life struggles as instead the struggles of a low ranking boxer. Also, the line most people remember is "ADRIAAAAAN!" although when you actually see the movie, you start to understand why...

How do you follow up a story quite as crazy as Carnosaur? Simple! Discard absolutely everything except for one shred so you can prove what you are making really is a sequel, and save even more money by using a script that everyone already knows! This brings us Carnosaur 2, a Roger Corman production that.. seems pretty damn similar to something else I know...

The career of Sylvester Stallone is an interesting tale... so why not explore one of his earliest works? No, not that! The one that shot him into stardom, a movie he wrote his damn self: Rocky! It's a semi-autobiographical work, with Stallone depicting his own life struggles as instead the struggles of a low ranking boxer. Also, the line most people remember is "ADRIAAAAAN!" although when you actually see the movie, you start to understand why...

After Rocky, there was Rocky II. Then III, IV, yeah you know how it went.. however, Stallone was getting more work outside the Rocky franchise! It didn't exactly go too well for him, until he took the lead of the 1982 classic First Blood, as John Rambo. This film was successful enough that many think it caused all action movies henceforth to stick to the 90 minute runtime. Just putting this out there... it could also explain why every single action movie hero out there is named John, as well.

It's the 4th of July, and I'm in Texas. Could this have possibly gone any other way? In celebration of the independence of the United States of America, we do what we can to blow up our fair share of this country.

Due to this week being quite hectic, and the fact that I had put quite a lot extra on my plate recently, this week's review will be a little late. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Los Angeles is infested with crime, with a cult of murderers killing helpless women.. I mean, unconnected people with not distinct pattern... and only one man can stop them. He happens to be a super badass cop who is so good at his job, the entire police force hates him, The Cobra! Also, I don't mean to surprise you, but this is an 80s action movie. Never would have guessed, huh?

While the ending of First Blood was changed because test audiences didn't want to see the character they grew to love die, the sequel pretty much discarded that character anyway and gave us a balls-to-the-wall action extravaganza. Rambo: First Blood Part II sends John Rambo back to Vietnam, to rescue prisoners of war.. but along the way, he learns something about life. Mostly how to end it by blowing shit up.

Things being as behind as they are.. they're.. still behind. Blargh. Anyhow, while you wait, did you know that Creepy's been uploading videos of me playing The Lost Levels at his place?

The Summer of Sylvester Stallone continues with Assassins, a 1995 film about.. oh yeah. Well, it also stars Antonio Banderas as the character you will enjoy watching. Sadly, he's the "bad guy." It's almost like the filmmakers thought entertainment was to be avoided...

Admit it. If I didn't review this one during THE SUMMER OF SYLVESTER STALLONE you'd all track me down and judge me. The same year Assassins came out, we got another much more infamous Stallone flick.. that being this one, Judge Dredd. It was based on a comic, but.. well.. what happens when Hollywood gets their hands on any established intellectual property? Make the same movie they've made 5000 times before, but with the skin of the new IP. Does it matter that it breaks just about every character? I'll be the judge of that.

What means Expendable? Get a bunch of action movie stars from the local retirement home and blow shit up! The Expendables sought to rekindle the spirit of the classic action movie blockbusters, by using the same ingredients to make them. Of course, some critics didn't think it worked. Or it did? I dunno, most of em complained that Stallone made an action movie.

In Rambo III, the Vietnam veteran throws the jungles to the wayside in order to go to Afghanistan and fight the REAL threat... Russians! Yeah, this is definitely a movie from 1988... but on the plus side, we get a change of scenery. Though now I kinda wish the 4th movie took place in the arctic...

I apologize for the delays, but hope you enjoy the cartoon.

A much more recent example of Stallone's work from 2012, Bullet to the Head has him star as Jumpin' Jimmy Bobo. Or.. just Jimmy Bobo? Jimm... bobonobona... aaah! He's a criminal who must team up with a cop to take out criminals who are conspiring to help people. Which is bad. Because conspiracy.

Continuing the Summer of Sylvester Stallone, it's time we look at The Expendables 2. After the first did surprisingly well, many actors jumped at the chance to be featured in the second.. specifically one who turned down his role in the first, Jean Claude Van Damme. It's a sequel, so it's bigger.. but is it better?

This particular review has been a major request ever since The Summer of Sylvester Stallone was announced. It would seem that is for good reason, as it pairs Stallone with Kurt Russel in a classic 80s police action movie. Is it deep, emotional and life changing? No.. but it just may be popcorn entertainment at it's finest.

Geez, it feels like it's been YEARS since my last Top 10 list... oh, wait. Point is, this time we're looking at the epic hero of awesomeness responsible for some of the most deaths per minute on film! It wasn't easy picking the best 10.. so I disqualified most of them for arbitrary reasons. Enjoy!

The Summer of Sylvester Stallone comes to an end in an epic battle of.. okay, it's another sequel. But it the latest movie in the Expendables franchise, so that has to count for something! This time around, Barney Ross has to take out a former member of his own team, and he feels the best way to do this is by throwing out his entire team. The f#ck?

Leaving the summer behind, we hit the hot asphalt with David Carradine in Death Race 2000. A classic Corman production, the movie was Carradine's first work past Kung Fu. It was also the first offer he got after said series, which he jumped on due to fears about being "the kung fu guy" and fading into obscurity. Oh yeah.. the movie.. what about that? Well, you did watch the video, right?

Many many thanks for all the continued support via Patreon. While the general understanding many have is that the money intended to improve a show or keep it going doesn't do that whatsoever with examples x and y, I wanted to let everyone know that indeed the funds have gone towards something that will help give the show a more professional look. Even better, I'll look uglier than ever before! Frizzy hair, grey hair, bad teeth.. all in glorious 4k with a high quality 1 inch sensor! WOOT!

Video games and horror.. it's almost like peanut butter and jelly.. THAT KILLS YOU. Or, that might make a better movie as I'm still searching for the "killer video game" horror flick that holds up today. Brainscan takes a stab at the genre, with a heavy influence from the 90s fear of ultraviolent entertainment leading directly to murder.

Possibly the best known monster movie of the 1990s, Tremors harkens back to the classic monster movie formula from the studio responsible for so many classic monster movies.. Universal. Sure, their robot hit this with a copyright claim before I even got a chance to finish writing the description, but let's not hold that against them. The important thing is we have giant killer worms burrowing underground, death.. destruction.. and Kevin Bacon!

After the success of Tremors on home video, it should come as no surprise that it spawned a direct-to-video sequel. Tremors 2: Aftershocks released 6 years after the first, and quite a lot is different this time around. Not only are very few of the original cast present, but the creatures have fled south of the border... and a new beast has appeared! In fact things get so new, it is at times hard to see this as a sequel to Tremors...

Computer stores hate him! Learn this one weird trick to produce highly edited 4k content on old hardware! You won't believe what happens next!

As Tremors 1 and 2 ruled the home video market of the 90s, it should come as no surprise that Tremors 3 would be greenlit. It may be surprising that it took them so long to do it, waiting until 2001 to get the movie made.. but hey, it was also a way to set up a Tremors TV series. The series that didn't come out until 2003. Eh.. you know, the more I try to explain the movie the more confusing it gets..

In 2004, one year after the Tremors TV series came and went and only 3 years since Tremors 3, a new entry in the film franchise came out! However, we can't have it be too much like the others, that wouldn't do well at all to bring in the monies. So what to do? Simple, set it in the same place as the first with characters very much like those found in the first, but this time IT'S A WESTERN! Didn't see that coming, did ya?

The final movie in the franchise.. at least so far, brings back MICHAEL GROSS AS BURT GUMMER! Which is enough to score one bonus star already in my book. But this is the first Tremors movie since 4 in 2004, so they had to bring everyone back up to speed, capitalize on nostalgia and do something completely different. They accomplish this by doing EVERYTHING! Seriously, this has more actors/characters than the TV Series pilot Tremors 3.

The 4th entry in the Starship Troopers series released in 2012, Invasion is a computer animated movie produced in Japan. As such the direction is quite a bit different than any film in the series, but considering how the last 2 entries went perhaps a drastic departure is exactly what we needed. There really is no question it is certainly better than the 2nd or 3rd, I'm not spoiling anything here.. but how exactly does it stack up on it's own?

The Dungeons and Dragons movie disappointed the world in 2000, and Wrath of the Dragon God left everyone to believe that while a D&D movie may be a fun idea, it will never be "good" in 2005, it took until 2012 for the third attempt at a motion picture about a legendary adventure taking place in the world of the legendary game. Legendary. Legends. Thing is, this time around they mix it up even more. Instead of following the Hollywood adventure of Marlon Wayans, or the game session translated to film of the 2nd movie, we get a game session translated to film from an EVIL campaign. That does mix things up quite a bit, as the best of roleplayers constantly kill each other before completing their adventures in said games.

Happy Thanksgiving, one and all! To celebrate, let's dig into the true meaning of the day. No, not family and friends. No, not being thankful for this that or the other. Offensive stereotypes and horrible killing set to cheerful musical numbers! For this, we turn to Troma and their film Poultrygeist. Though not a "thanksgiving" movie officially, it's got more to do with the day than certain horror films with a thanksgiving theme. And boobs. Lots and lots of boobs... and gore. And poop!

As the Carnosaur series continued to be pumped out by Roger Corman, Carnosaur 3 was the first of them to be released direct to video. Unbelievably enough, this does actually mean the special effects quality is even lower than last time and the writing takes a hit as well. Or maybe is better cause they didn't just take another movie's plot and add dinosaurs?

Deep in the heart of the Congo hides the elusive creature, Mokele-Mbembe. To prove it's existence, a team of British Cryptozoologists embark on a quest to find and record proof it is real. Oh, and they think it's a plesiosaur. And they think that's a dinosaur. They're doomed.

You know, normally I make a title card for these things that shows the dinosaurs in the movie. Thing is, I go for the ones actually made for the movie, and this one didn't have any. Oh there were dinosaurs, but every single one of them is stock footage. So this is how far we've gone....

This week, we look at a world that is still stuck in the Jurassic.. in Planet of Dinosaurs! This take on "astronauts f#ck something up and wind up in deep shit" sends a small group to a planet full of dinosaurs. I may be repeating myself, but that really is the whole plot right there.

You weren't really worried that Dinocember 2 was going to pass without this particular film being tackled, were you? Jurassic World was such a major event in film, being the first Jurassic Park movie released in over a decade, it quickly became the top movie of the year (luckily released before The Force Awakens) and it's looming release inspired the original Dinocember. But I'm not here to gawk over how grand a project it was, my job is to pick it apart scene by scene and find everything I can to complain about. Then decide if I like it despite that. :D