We Need Answers

A while back Mark Watson and Tim Key invented a game. Now it's a series and Alex is the commentator. Watch, listen, learn, absorb. This is No More Women.

After being roundly beaten in Round 1 by the thin comedian (and skinny novelist) Mark Watson, Tim Key is back with a vengeance. The game is No More Women. The rules are self-explanatory. The tension is magnificent. This time they're playing in the We Need Answers offices during their lunchbreak. I (Alex Horne in charge of equipment) didn't get to have any lunch because I had to sort out the microphones. Also Tim is wearing my t-shirt.

If you're new to No More Women, welcome. Good timing. The contest captured here is a perfect example of how the game should be played. Tim (Key) and Mark (Watson) are not only the inventors of No More Women but they play the thing with real verve and panache. It's great to watch. It's great to commentate on. It's great. Particularly this episode. My favourite so far. So, again, welcome.

What better way to spend Xmas day than to play a little No More Women after dinner. Filmed minutes before a particularly energetic episode of We Need Answers, Tim Key and Mark Watson resume their long-running series of No More Women: a name-game they invented some time ago, which is now creeping slowly across the country, like mist in the morning. Soon no-one will be able to do anything because it'll be everywhere (that goes for the mist or the all-consuming game - it's not a bad analogy). By the way, I'm Alex Horne and I'm in charge of the commentary and the analogies.

Mark Watson and Tim Key never thought a game they invented on a car journey would ever reach such dizzy heights as these. Now, just minutes before facing the spectacular Jennie Bond in another thrilling episode of We Need Answers, Tim plays the game against the most handsome man in Britain, T4's Mr Rick Edwards. No More Women is fast taking over the world. Jump on the bandwagon at once before it flies past you.

In the second of the No More Women Exhibition Matches, experienced player and inventor of the game Mark Watson takes on newcomer DJ Nihal who usually works on Radio One (FM). The contest takes place on the actual set of We Need Answers (BBC4) so there's a lot of orange about. You also get to see co-inventor Tim Key for the merest of moments. The game itself is an epic. As epic a 3 minute 50 second name-game on the internet could ever be, anyway.

In the third of the No More Women Exhibition Matches, a surprisingly dapper Tim Key introduces the game to the poet laureate of Barnsley FC, Ian McMillan (who was once the person who sits with Adrian and Christine on The One Show so is an excellent booking). Again, this takes place on the set of We Need Answers so you get a close up look at just how economical and orange the quiz is. As for the game, it's a good one, but I was never sure Ian fully understood the importance of calling 'Challenge!' , while Tim played it in a rather unsporting fashion. So not ideal.

After a successful series of exhibition matches, the old foes meet again; Mark Watson (wiry, married) and Tim Key (droopy, late). Played in a booth just after breakfast, this is a tensish battle. Mark seems to care more than Tim but then he is generally more highly strung. As usual I (Alex Horne) commentate, operate a camera and write this bit. Lucy (unsung hero/producer) does the other camera and everything else (except for the graphics - Iain you're tremendous).

In what has already been called a classic No More Women series, Tim Key leads Mark Watson 3-2 as they meet in the lobby area of the BBC. What follows is extraordinary. Not only do the two play with wit, glamour and intensity, but someone in the background does something remarkable. This is an incredible piece of internet.

It's the game we've all wanted to see for so long. The man who usually talks inanely over the action finally gets to take part in the action and talk inanely over that. Yes, Alex Horne - We Need Answers geek, No More Women co-producer and me - is finally allowed on screen for more than twenty seconds. And boy does he (I) make these four and a half minutes count. They really count. Every second counts.