Q.E.D. (1982-1999)

How to Pick Up Girls, Win Arguments and Influence People with Arnold has one wish: he wants to be successful.- At everything. In. tonight's film all his wishes are granted. Among those offering to help are Dale Carnegie , Machiavelli, Bob Sharpe and Michael Korda Will Arnold find his dream girl? Will he rule the world? Will true happiness be his?

In the jungles of South-East Asia entire bushes light up like Christmas trees, and in the Caribbean the seas glow with a luminous light. It's called bioluminescence - a term used to describe the many extraordinary creatures that turn themselves on in the dark. Watch fireflies in their hundreds' pulsing messages in the dark scuba dive in search of fish that-blink and flash, and swim among clouds of luminous plankton: And discover why the US Navy so very interested.

Judith Hann cordially invites you to join her at dinner with Professor Nicholas Kuru , the world's premier gastrophysicist, and friends, including Michel Roux , Master Chef. On the menu will be some familiar dishes cooked in a most unfamiliar way; and, never before seen on TV the reverse baked alaska, with the hot bit inside.

Every hour of every day dozens of spy-in-the-sky satellites are peering down at us from space. What are they looking for and what can they see? Apart from the weather satellites, other spacecraft are busy sending back spectacular pictures of the earth's surface, particularly for oil and mining companies. But the real super spies are the military satellites used by Russia and the USA. What they can see of each other from space is top secret, but there's enough evidence to show they can see an awful lot more than you think.

Unique, designer-built, jet-powered car. Code name Project Thrust. All metal wheels, £8,000 each, low mileage, fuel consumption 50 gallons a minute, 0-300 mph in 12 seconds, estimated top speed 650 mph. Brainchild of driver Richard Noble. Highly suitable for attempt to win back for Britain the world land speed record.

'If music be the food of love, play on '. But what kind of music should one play for which girl? And does it change from country to country? In the West there is almost total agreement over what romantic music should sound like. Indeed there is music to go with every kind of mood and occasion, from weddings to cowboy films. we hear it and we simply know its right for a particular emotion. By why should music convey emotions? Are musical notes themselves actually sad or happy? And if so, why then do Indian love songs sound completely different from our own?

Why is a Tornado like a gannet? The first is an RAF combat aircraft, while a gannet is a bird that dives vertically for.fish. The answer? Well, both are designed to kill-and both use variable-geometry wings. Birds and aeroplanes ride the air by the same rules, but how far do the similarities go? Aircraft sometimes stall dangerously - but do birds? Why do some birds fly in ' V' formations? And how have birds' wings made flying safer for everybody?

The first half of the programme looks at the physical effects of a single medium-sized nuclear warhead on a large city. How effectively would various types of shelter protect us from these effects? Two couples experimentally live in fall-out shelters for ten days each. The implications of the film are then discussed by medical, scientific and civil defence specialists. Would cities be likely targets in a real nuclear attack? What kind of resources would be available to deal with the aftermath of such a calamity? And what could we do - practically - to diminish the effect if it ever were to happen?

As part of Wednesday's Q.E.D. documentary, A Guide to Armageddon, two London couples each volunteered to carry out a ten-day 'consumer test' - underground in a nuclear shelter. Joy and Erik sealed themselves in a £10,000 buried steel bunker, six feet underground. Ken and Liz followed Home Office recommendations and dug their own 36-inch-wide emergency trench in the back garden. They, too, stayed down for ten days. This programme is a record of how the two couples coped underground during last winter's severe cold spell with only a fixed camera to observe them, completely out of touch with the outside world.

Farlv September 1982. In the Sabra and Chatila district of West Beirut, the civilian population was settling down to rebuilding lives and homes broken by three months of bombing, shelling and shooting. They were doing what they have been doing for the past eight years - trying to make the best of it. At Gaza Hospital, British doctors and nurses were among the foreign volunteers who were trying to cope with the human debris of modern siege and bombardment.

A bullet slices a playing card in two. An orange takes two weeks to rot. Much of the world around us moves too quickly-or too slowly - for us to see. Tiny mushrooms grow on the roots of our own hair; and heat rises invisibly from our heads; too small or too transparent to see. For The Invisible World an impressive array of equipment was gathered to photograph things our eyes cannot see. The result is a fascinating collection of images, some startling, many very beautiful.

Locked away from sight in Turin Cathedral lies a 14ft long piece of linen. Scorched, patched and yellowed with age, it bears the faint image of a crucified man. Is it the work ot^a 14th-century artist, or is it the miracle of miracles - a true image of Jesus of Nazareth? To help answer that question, the Holy Shroud of Turin has been tested by the most advanced science known to man. Tonight Q.E.D reports on the investigation, and reveals the surprising result of its own unique experiment.

Do you have trouble getting to sleep at night? Spare a thought for Leslie Gamble. He claims he has not slept for 11 years. On the other hand Joyce Hannon always feels incredibly tired. Many times a day she simply falls asleep whatever she happens to be doing. Joyce has narcolepsy -a quarter of a million Americans have it-but the odds are you won't have heard of it, because the world of sleep is shrouded in ignorance. Yet it's a world in which we spend a third of our lives.

There are some days when mechanical things can just drive you crazy - like the car that refuses to start when you're already half-an-hour late or the phone that only gets wrong numbers or the key that sticks in the lock or the tap that won't stop dripping.... What can we do about them? Tim Hunkin , ex-engineer, inventor and Observer cartoonist, has his own ideas. In this programme, with the help of a mechanical barman, a flying sheep, some gunpowder and a DC10, Tim looks at machines and suggests, with his own animated cartoons, ways of making them more reliable.

On 17 October 1981 the New-market Champion Stakes was won by the Aga Khan 's Vayrann. Routine tests showed traces of anabolic steroids and horse and trainer faced disqualification for doping. But eventually the horse was declared by the Jockey Club to have produced his own anabolic steroids. How can this happen? And is dope testing accurate? Reporter KIERAN prendiville talks to Dick Francis , Vayrann's trainer Francois Mathet and others as he pieces together what actually happened behind the scenes in a scientific whodunit where the chemical detectives turn out to provide some false clues.

The continuing saga of Richard Noble 's quest to become the fastest man In the world. The place: rpriarh Nevada, on the edge of the mack Rock Desert. The date: 4 November, just four weeks ago From the desert comes the crackling roar of a jet engine. A plume of dust streaks across the flat desert floor. Thrust II is challenging for the land speed record of 622 mph. It's the final day of an eight year-long dream. Last year floods stopped him This year he had floods again and then the local environmentalists got the attempt temporarily banned. But at last all seems well and he's ready to go ...