Seeing no benefit in his £38,000 pools win, Pettigrew plans to give it all to the Four-Footed Friends Fund. Disgusted, Jim urges him to first sample the fleshpots, so they head off for a night of wine, women and song at the flashy Ritz-Canton.

The lovesick geography master, Mr. Halliforth, announces his engagement to Mildred, daughter of the village tea shop proprietor. The Headmaster convinces him of the folly of such a union until he learns of a £8000 inheritance.

Mr. Halliforth departs and his Welsh replacement, Mr. Mor­gan, demands that the teachers’ salaries are raised to regulation levels. To find the money, Jim plans to run adult evening classes, until he discovers a demand for English lessons for foreign domestics.

Jim decides to give a poor urchin free education at Chiselbury and ensures maximum publicity by appearing on the Tonight TV show. Suddenly he has two weeks to make a gen­tleman out of a young tough from the Dockland slums.

The Head is preparing for a winter holiday in St. Moritz when the doctor diagnoses an infectious case of measles in the school. Jim upsets Pettigrew by refusing to authorise extra food for the quarantined boys, and so suffers a troubled sleep during which he is visited by his conscience.

Visiting disciplinarian Admiral Sir Archibald Ballard is concerned about Chiselbury’s 95% school leaver unemployment figures. He insists that before his next visit, Prof. Edwards appoint a vocational guidance master and find a position for the unemployable R. A. Hunter.