This is a car from the 90's. In the 90's station wagons were allowed to be called station wagons. In 2015 station wagons are called "crossovers" because manufacturers are fearful men won't buy their cars if they are less than 100% manly. I used to work in a camera shop and all the Dads bought Canon point-and-shoot cameras because they were called ""Powershots."" The Dads didn't want Nikons because they were called "Coolpix." Coolpix sounds like a girl's first perfume. In an age when men are injecting Synthol into their muscles, "station wagon" means ""pussy-whipped." The bros lose because the Outbacks were some of the greatest cars ever made.

How normal can you get? The official car of first promotions and hand-me downs.

This is a captured import and the bloodbag that kept Chrysler's sports car's division conscious though the early 90's rebuilding years. Goat. All this is is a Mitsubishi Eclipse, front wheel drive turbo, with a BADGE OF FREEDOM.

The CRX is a drool-fest for message-board hype and crowbar lust. This is a USDM CRX which means it is study-hall slow. But like a teal-colored Home-Ec room, you have to discover your own fun. Is it the CRX or the CR-X. And then there's the DCX-lifers who insist this isn't a Civic.

Oh, by George! Is that a Chevrolet Corvette with an automatic transmission? Indeed it is! Oh yes, to have your gears changed for you is so fancy! The cars knows what to do yes. My rectum is occupied by a roll of nickles.

This is a derivative of the motorcycle Hunter S. Thompson reviewed in his article "Song of the Sausage Creature."

This bleached warrior with a nutcracker of an engine has one purpose: embarrass anything with a Ferrari badge. Also, thank you to Matt D'Andria from http://motorator.com/ and co-host of Carcast with Adam Carrola for guest-starring in this review via Skype.

Nissan S13: The Japanese Fox Body. Today, you get a double-review. Here are two S13's from 1989. One is a USDM and the other is JDM. My cock is still on dial-up.

Again. Because robots.

Air goes round round round round and I'm going to tell you have a Wankel engine works weather you like it or not!

Every car I drive from now on will be compared to THIS.