Squidward and Squilliam have a lot in common - like a love for fine things, long noses, and even similar voices. Could there be an imposter among us? The Bikini Bottom Inquirer investigates....

Welcome to Bikini Bottom Inquirer with Perch Perkins, bringing you all the latest news in Bikini Bottom! Tonight's top stories: local fry cook SpongeBob SquarePants and local star fish Patrick Star were found fighting in the buff, and a squirrel has been seen blasting into space in a rocket ship!

Tune into the Bikini Bottom Inquirer with Bikini Bottom's SECOND best reporter, Lurch Lurkens. Lurch gives you the latest on Perch Perkins new haircut! Well, kind of...

Breaking news! Looks like recent security camera footage reveals the true nature of the Bikini Bottom ghosts! What could be scarier than that? ????

Inanimate objects gaining sentience in Bikini Bottom.. Bubble Buddy? DoodleBob? Does this really have a connection to SpongeBob..? No comment.

Perch Perkins with the latest! A whale call linked to a flash flood? It couldn't be Pearl... right?

Here are the top stories from the Bikini Bottom Inquirer! This is the latest on lifeless mannequins, shrinking spray, and a viral dance challenge from Perch Perkins himself!

Here's the latest on the Bikini Bottom Inquirer with Perch Perkins! Learn 'the sponge' at your own risk. Who knew bouncing around uncontrollably would lead to so many injuries... ????

Here is the latest from the Bikini Bottom Inquirer! Perch gets an anonymous caller on his Perch phone about SpongeBob's dance. Meep... meep indeed.

A rock won the annual snail race?! Even beat Gary and Snellie? Check out the latest from the Bikini Bottom Inquirer, brought to you by Perch Perkins... for now at least!