RiffTrax

Rescueman (3x194)

: 17, 2013

Up in the sky! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s...a kid wearing underoos who’s way too old to be wearing underoos! This short tells us the story of Scotty, who is obsessed with a superhero named Rescueman. Rescueman’s specialty is rescuing people, believe it or not. We assumed that that was sort of par for the course for every superhero. Most of them have something else going on, but not Rescueman! Scotty goes on a field trip to the airport and despite looking like he’s about to enter middle school, spends the entire time mentally composing Rescueman/Safety Woman slashfic and thinking about his new Rescueman underoos. Does the short end with Scotty fantasizing about rescuing his classmates from a horrific bus crash while wearing said humiliating underoos? Do you even have to ask at this point? Rescueman teaches kids about bus safety the only way that the state of Pennsylvania knew how: incompetently with an absurd emphasis on bending your knees when you jump out of the bus. Join us, true believers!